You know what you need to do…

so just do it!
Last night, I went out to dinner with my roommate and one of my favorite professors.
This professor has this beautiful way of cutting through all of the fluff that we wrap around ourselves to protect us from prying eyes. She cuts through to the quick and forces you to deal with the rough emotions that you are refusing to pay attention to.
We were talking about how my possibilities after college were shaping up and what was the next step.
I mentioned that I was afraid of not being able to handle the rigors of my internship. How I wanted my family and friends to see God’s grace, how I’m sadden by the quickly approaching loss of a dear friend, and how ready I am if God calls me home.
She looked at me and said with great intensity, “You know what you need to do, so just do it!”
She told me that my focus was too small. That God has called me to something bigger than just those I love, that to focus on just my family and friends was to miss what God wanted me to do with my life.
It was hard to swallow. For me, my friends and family are why I do a lot of things. But, at the same time it holds me back. Because I do not want to fail.
The thought that I might be called to something bigger? Terrifies this little introvert to her bones.
I know that God has large plans for me, but at the same time I always thought that perhaps it was what I would consider to be ‘large’—you know, maybe 20 people at most. Now I’m thinking that might not be what he has planned.
I do not know what the rest of this year will bring, much less the rest of my life.
But, I do know one thing.
Like my professor says: “Get out of your own way and do what needs to be done.”
Fear has this power to hold you in place. You can fear the trail and never see the view. Or you can fear the trail but just walk with care, and be rewarded with an amazing life altering view.
I know what I need to do. Now? I need to just do it. Step out in faith and know God will catch me.
Is fear holding me? Or is it helping me?
I just need to do it.

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